Domestic Bliss Report

Motherhood is hard work. If we don't stick together, we'll all fall apart.

Monday, March 24, 2008

Wonderful Grandma

I'll admit I have ambivalent feelings about my mother. She's a much more affectionate, fun, loving grandmother than I remember her being as a mother. I suppose that's okay, the burden is off of her. I try to remind myself it's like the moonlight--her love for me, while not directed at me, is reflected in her absolute adoration of her grandkids. And my husband reminds me that I'd rather she show them than me; it's that mother/sacrificial thing. It helps.

But there are times when her love and understanding of my situation come shining right through. One example is Sunday, chaufferring the big two to Mass. She's also come over weekly for dinner and stayed with Rachel while I took the others to swim class. More than once she's shown up right after lunch, instead of 4:00, by surprise. These have just coincidentally been bad days. What does she do? Take charge of lunch and shoo me off to a shower or nap. Nice days, she'll take them for a walk and let me stay home and catch up on chores or just enjoy the quiet. Mom had three kids, the oldest was 26 months old. She has an idea of how isolating, how mind-numbing it can be some days.

So today, when she dropped by just after 4, I wasn't terribly shocked to see her. We'd visited SuperShelly for lunch and stayed to chat and let the kids play, but I was still missing the sunshine. Her words before she took off her scarf were, "Have you taken them for a walk yet today?"
"No, but I will now!" I knew she meant to stay with Louie and let the rest of us out. And what a walk it was, cold and clear and refreshing. I thanked her before we left.
"You've said that three times already," she chuckled.
I thought for a second. "Mom, if someone you knew and trusted had just dropped by on a day like this, when your son was five or six months old, and said, 'Why don't you go for a walk with the girls and I'll stay with him?' what would you have done?"
"I'd probably still be thanking them."

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At 12:29 PM, Blogger Shelly said...

Mom's are great that way. My mom's help comes in the form of phone calls and laughter. Miles between us keep us from seeing each other very often but I have to say, when she calls I definitely feel better just to hear her voice. :-)

Love the post.

At 11:16 AM, Blogger Kasia said...

OK, this has nothing to do with your post, but I thought you'd like to know that Bp. Flores is speaking at the seminary on Cinco de Mayo. It's open to the public. I have the flyer. You want?

At 5:30 PM, Blogger Heather said...

Cinco de Mayo... Will he be speaking in English or Spanish? That IS relevant if my kids are going to be there.

At 9:12 AM, Blogger Kasia said...

I would assume English, since the flyer was in English; but as it's billed as an "Evening of Reflection", I don't know if kids would be encouraged. I posted the particulars over on my blog, just in case you or someone else wanted to know.


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