Domestic Bliss Report

Motherhood is hard work. If we don't stick together, we'll all fall apart.

Friday, August 31, 2007

"This is NOT how I planned things!"

That was a neighbor's complaint the other day. Quite justified, I thought.
I turned to her. "You mean you didn't wake up one day at 18 or so and decide, 'I think I'll marry an abusive jerk, have two of his kids, bust my backside working to support us, get into a situation where I leave suddenly with the kids and get to spend some time at a shelter, move in with some friends where we get to share one room, start divorce proceedings, then find a low-paying job where I get sexually harassed? Well, ma'am, that makes you smart!"

She laughed, which was my goal. How few of us actually plan all of the details of our lives? Or even the big things? Including myself.

Last month or so, my beloved started chuckling to himself while driving home from church.
"What's funny?" I inquired.
"You, honey. Back in college, did you ever imagine yourself tooling along in a minivan on your way home from church with three kids, pregnant with another, listening to country music?"
I thought about it. Good question. I never gave much thought to what car I'd be driving. Even now I identify them by color. I always knew I wanted kids--at least two, but not sure about more. That's different. I was raised Catholic, so the church thing wasn't that odd either.
"Well, the country music is a surprise."

I guess I've just learned to roll with the punches.

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At 6:55 AM, Blogger Catherine said...

The funny thing about my life is how much of it I did actually plan... when I was ten. I knew I'd marry a man with brown hair, have kids, stay at home with them, be Catholic, the whole bit. The whole thing of temporarily single-parenting-it during deployments would be the biggest surprise. Never quite figured on that in my childhood dreams.

At 10:46 AM, Blogger Melanie B said...


So funny. I think my answer would have been exactly the same: "Well, the country music is a surprise."
Of course I'm also not working on kid #4; but the other essentials pretty much fit perfectly.

I hated country music in high school. It was what those kids listened to: the ones who wore boots and huge belt buckles to school. Now I flip between the classical and country stations. It is a bit of a surprise.


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